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3/05/2024 2:36 pm  #1


Other People's Drama

Sometimes I think it helps to remember that other people's lives are super weird, too. Like you just never know.

Case in point: a friend of mine, who is half-Chinese, half-Caucasian, was raised by his mother and had only minimal contact with his dad, who fucked off to China sometime shortly after my friend was born. In my friend's late teens (i.e., about 20 years ago,) he was informed by some relatives in China that his dad had died, and that was the last time he heard from them. Life goes on.

But now, out of the blue, an aunt in China has reached out to let my friend know that when his dad died, he actually left my friend 25% of an apartment in Shanghai. (This is the first he's heard of being included in his father's will at all.) The aunt and another relative also each own 25% of this apartment, and the final 25% is owned by the dad's new wife, who has continued living in the apartment for the last 20 years. The relatives want to sell, the new wife doesn't, and the aunt has reached out to my friend to get him on board so they can vote her out.

And he's kind of torn about the whole thing--all else being equal, he could definitely use the money. But it also feels like he's being used as a pawn to force a widow out of her home. He's been assured by the aunt (whom he barely knows) that the wife (whom he didn't know about at all) was not, in fact, the love of his dad's life, just a last-minute, super-age-inappropriate fling--she's basically the same age as my friend, so widow-ness aside, she's not a decrepit old lady, and has no children to support or anything like that.

And it's not like he can just refuse to deal with it forever. At some point, the apartment will have to sell, so why not get the proceeds now when he could really use them? But then there's all the insane paperwork to deal with over international borders.

Anyway, windfall or not, I'm glad no one has reached out to me to announce I'm the secret inheritor of overseas property. Also, you should never leave property to multiple people in a will. Figure out some other equitable divide for your assets, or else stipulate that the house will be sold and only the proceeds will be split. But having multiple names on a deed is a massive hassle, even if the people named don't want anything to do with the house or its proceeds.
 

 

3/05/2024 2:52 pm  #2


Re: Other People's Drama

You know, that apartment in Shanghai is worth A LOT more today than it was 20 years ago.  Shanghai is a completely different city today. Ka Ching!
 

 

3/06/2024 6:51 am  #3


Re: Other People's Drama

It's pretty cool that they never would have told him if they had worked it out among themselves...


If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis Brandeis
 

3/06/2024 8:25 am  #4


Re: Other People's Drama

Oh for sure! There's also an element of, "maybe I sign these forms and then they sell and never send me the money." He can't afford to chase it down, and I'm pretty sure they know that.

     Thread Starter
 

3/06/2024 1:08 pm  #5


Re: Other People's Drama

It is not such a bad problem to have.
He needs to learn about Chinese estate and real estate laws.
And to learn about his step-mother.

 

3/06/2024 1:49 pm  #6


Re: Other People's Drama

As someone who deals a little with Chinese laws, I can tell you that it's not something you can pick up easily and there is a reason for lawyers who specialize in this stuff.  I sat through an hour long overview yesterday of new Chinese trademark rules, and the only thing I remember from it is to call the Chinese professionals because there are SO MANY ways to get screwed in China.

 

3/06/2024 6:23 pm  #7


Re: Other People's Drama

I hope it’s not a scam in which they’re baiting your friend and will get around to asking him for money to pursue legal action if he shows enough interest. I find it disconcerting that the other two relatives, who own 50% between them, haven’t simply offered to buy your friend out which is how multiple ownership is often settled. Especially since your friend wasn’t expecting anything and probably wouldn’t haggle over it.

He would do well to contact the stepmother and get her side to help verify the legitimacy of the situation.

 

3/08/2024 1:56 am  #8


Re: Other People's Drama

glatt wrote:

You know, that apartment in Shanghai is worth A LOT more today than it was 20 years ago.  Shanghai is a completely different city today. Ka Ching!

Yes but agents and lawyers, and maybe taxes kill the Ka. Then a 4 way split of Ching! leaves about g! for him. Out of that a least a lawyer or two because he can't trust any of the kin involved... and taxes, So he may end up with ! for his trouble.
If he finds it's not worth his trouble maybe payback time for the kin that waited 20 years and were in a bind to even tell him about it.
I wonder if this 4 way is in writing or if the widow had agreed the 3 would have sold it and he wouldn't of had a clue?
 


 Freedom is just another word for nothin' left to lose.
 
 

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