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12/23/2020 3:25 am  #1

Friends are good for listening

Back it the mid 70's there was a guy that lived with my wife and I for three years. Chopper, drugs, tattoos up one side and down the other, and gallons of Schlitz before they ruined it. So he met and married the sweetest girl I could imagine and were happy. Last August he died and I've talked to her on the phone a couple times. Last night I got home to a voice mail asking me to call her so I called.

She talked virtually non stop for 2 hours and 54 minutes. When I make a call my  land line phone shows the elapsed time. Every once in awhile she would say she was babbling on and I'd tell her the elapsed time but made no move to end the conversation and she'd be off and running again.
She wanted to talk about their marriage and relationship but not something she could bring up with her kids or sisters. They wouldn't approve but since I knew him years before she did I knew much about what went down so she didn't have to be careful what she said and could babble away.
I think she wanted someone to listen to her talk to herself, organize her thoughts. I did throw in a couple  points she wasn't aware of but mostly listened. I really didn't do anything but I think it helped.

What really amazed me is I sat here for three hours and didn't have to pee.

 Freedom is just another word for nothin' left to lose.

12/23/2020 9:10 am  #2

Re: Friends are good for listening

I'm sure it helped.  You did her a huge service listening.


12/23/2020 9:43 am  #3

Re: Friends are good for listening

Listening is awesome, I'm glad you were able to be there for her.


12/23/2020 8:13 pm  #4

Re: Friends are good for listening

I have to admit you had me in the first half.

Hey! That's me up there!

12/24/2020 7:27 am  #5

Re: Friends are good for listening

Powerful ear and bladder work sir, well done.

If you would only recognize that life is hard, things would be so much easier for you. - Louis Brandeis

3/02/2021 11:12 pm  #6

Re: Friends are good for listening

props, xoB, major props.

Relationships are a-flutter here too.

Twil and I are of an age where we have .. juice.  We have wisdom, autonomy, agency, money, privilege, .. y'know, juice.  And we have people, older and younger, who could benefit from that.  From our help.

Sometimes they (the helpees) know they need help but it's hard for them to ask. Sometimes they need help so much they are beyond the capacity to ask.  Preemptory, presumptuous, privileged , I hear you say.  I'm not disagreeing with you. but there's a forty year gap on either side... some can understand, some no longer can.

Both cases make me sad and tired.

Tonight it's mostly sad.

Be Just And Fear Not

3/02/2021 11:47 pm  #7

Re: Friends are good for listening

Good friends will help you move.
Great friends will help you move bodies.

Hey! That's me up there!

3/02/2021 11:57 pm  #8

Re: Friends are good for listening

Speaking for myself, 

I'd be very grateful to postpone, indefinitely, if possible, all promotions from good to great.

just... not right now. I can't right now.

Be Just And Fear Not

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