TheNeverWas wrote:

Dear Dwellars,

I would like to take this opportunity to let you all know, because I know you're dying to, know, that is, that I, TheNeverWas, am, currently, at this moment, high as balls.

Carry on, you poor straight bastards.

Sincerely,

TheNeverWas
 

Come on, admit it. You've been on the boot polish again, haven't you?

It never ends well, you know.

Soldier trying to get high lighting boot polish set fire to his barracks

A British Army soldier has been kicked out of the military after he tried to get high by setting fire to boot polish but sparked a blaze at his barracks instead.
Lance Corporal David Thomas became disorientated after sniffing the fumes from the burning tin and dropped it on the floor, before wandering off, a court martial heard. 
Unbeknownst to him, the polish then set fire to a sofa in the common room where he'd lit it, setting off the smoke alarm and forcing fellow squaddies to put the blaze out with a fire extinguisher.
The 28-year-old admitted causing £1,600 worth of damage in the fire to the sofa and 'scorched' carpet and has now been dismissed from the Army after pleading guilty to arson.

The whole unfortunate business is related here: LINK

I am also pleased

glatt wrote:

It pleases me that you came here to tell us.

I got no friends, I had to tell somebody.

Wish ya coulda smelt it.

And, yes, I'm working on it.
 

Carruthers wrote:

If n is the number of shirts I have to iron, why is the number of hangers available always n-1?

Four shirts and three hangers or seven shirts and six hangers, it's always the damned same.

 

Stop ironing shirts.  You'll have more hangers than you ever thought could possibly exist.

One of the best things about moving to US ....as long as you get the laundry the minute the dryer stops, you never need to iron it.  Fucking A.  Couldn't believe it.  When we moved here, the apartment was fully furnished down to teaspoons and facecloths....... but no iron.  So weird, I immediately went out and bought one because beest needed 5 work shirts each week..... First load of laundry I did in these gigantic machines..... I learned why no iron.  Damn thing first got used later that year as the kids and I discovered perler beads (plastic beads you use to create shapes and designs on a frame, and then fuse together with an iron).  next use.  iron-on t-shirt transfers...

Last edited by monster (1/25/2022 6:31 pm)

BigV wrote:

Carruthers wrote:

If n is the number of shirts I have to iron, why is the number of hangers available always n-1?

Four shirts and three hangers or seven shirts and six hangers, it's always the damned same.

 

stop ironing Putin-style

So the Iron Curtain has been replaced by the Iron Shirt.

A worrying development.
 

Carruthers wrote:

If n is the number of shirts I have to iron, why is the number of hangers available always n-1?

Four shirts and three hangers or seven shirts and six hangers, it's always the damned same. 

So it's been that way since you destroyed a hangar to steal that car. No problem, throw away a shirt.
 

 happy to hear it

monster wrote:

Please rate this comment on a scale of M to 26 if  $ means absolute haggis and π is dead hobo

W
 

jsyk, I haven't got(ten) worse at typing, I just can't be arsed to edit for stupid typos that any idiot should be able to figure out any more :D (and get off my lawn unless you're weeding it)

yikes.

That's a good one.

footfootfoot wrote:

Carruthers wrote:

If n is the number of shirts I have to iron, why is the number of hangers available always n-1?

Four shirts and three hangers or seven shirts and six hangers, it's always the damned same.

 

It will always be thus if you are ironing your shirts in the nude.

If I was ironing in the nude at least I'd have one place to hang a shirt...


 

One of my memory techniques -especially for long numbers or long acronyms/strings of letters - is developing a word association that amuses me -usually by being rude.  My new world of work is a world of ridiculous acronyms, most of which are very similar and not really acronyms because they're not pronounceable in any way that's faster/easier than just saying the letters.  I must never tell any enquiring cow orker that I'm  working in pee-damage on the whores project.