The Cellar / How old do you want to live to be?

**Posted by monster** 11/01/2025 10:01 pm

and why

**Posted by Clodfobble** 11/03/2025 8:11 am

Old enough to still have most of my mind, and not be in daily pain. Whatever age that is.

**Posted by Flint** 11/03/2025 3:07 pm

I could probably maintain by hobbies for a really long time. I'm mostly interested in a "rich inner life"

**Posted by glatt** 11/04/2025 12:37 pm

I've been thinking about retirement a lot lately. And thinking about life expectancy. All the financial models map out spending to the mid 90s, but the actuarial models say I'll be lucky to make it past 85. There are more years behind me than I have in front of me, and I wonder why I should spend them working. I'm 58.

Probably half of the old people I know have gotten dementia, and it doesn't look so bad for them as long as it doesn't come hand in hand with anxiety. Who cares what reality is as long as you are content in the moment? My MIL has these wild stories of what she has been up to whenever we visit her in her assisted living facility. Trips to Amsterdam, visits to waterfalls where her glasses slipped off and slid down the rocks, only to disappear. And then somebody stole her truck, only to return it to the to other side of the building. Meanwhile, she hasn't left her floor.

Old people get lonely because everyone they know dies, so I don't know that I want to get that old. Mid 80s is fine with me. Unless there are huge advances in medicine and dementia treatment for the common man in the next few years, I don't see the point of very old age. Maybe I'll feel different if I get grandkids.

**Posted by monster** 11/04/2025 11:38 pm

I think I kinda want to make it into my 80s minimum, but I want to stop before I lose cognitive control. I don't want people to be making decisions for me while I drool and shit myself in a semi-vegetative state being an emotional and financial burden (I mean it'll be my $$ but that less for them when I finally croak) I figure while I still have cognitive control, I can refine my choices if necessary.

But if I'm in LaLa land, I'm not enjoying my life as the me that can have any effect on the real world, and to me ...there is then no point.

**Posted by glatt** 11/05/2025 10:40 am

To you today there is no point. But think of the most boring activities you do in your life today. Watching stupid shit on TV or scrolling social media. Even during those times, when you are mentally checked out, I imagine you still find some base level of enjoyment of life. I think dementia (as long as it's doesn't include anxiety) is similar.

If you have anxiety though, it's torture. There was this one woman at my MIL's rehab a couple weeks ago who kept remembering that her child died. It was as if she was just learning the news. She was reliving it constantly. Her wailing and sobs could be heard up and down the hallway. Please put a pillow over my face if that happens to me.

**Posted by monster** 11/05/2025 11:05 pm

how awful. I agree, I would not want to be like that. But it is distressing enough now when I cannot instantly remember something i know I know -and I'm only 55. I have older friends who are much worse and know it and they're getting pretty damn miserable about it. That would be my hell. I've never been much aesthetically or athletically, but I'm a reasonably smart cookie and I don't scroll on my phone or watch TV -I play word games and number games, I create word puzzles, i research things I don't know about, I play with words and I tell people on the internet when they are wrong ;) These would be things I wouldn't be able to do to my happiness levels

Last edited by monster (11/05/2025 11:06 pm)

**Posted by tw** 11/08/2025 2:10 pm

Old enough to say "Too old". It makes life easier.

And then when I say "Senior Coffee", they finally believe me.

**Posted by griff** 11/10/2025 11:26 am

It’s an interesting question. I’m better focused on my physical health than I was when I was working. We walk morning and evening and try to focus on the beauty in the natural world. Having moved, I’m memorizing new routes trying not to use gps etc… building our cabin is physically, intellectually, and even emotionally challenging. I’m forcing myself to meet new people and make new connections. I’m reading instead of watching tv in the evening. We’ll see if it all holds back dementia. I’m down 25 pounds from June when this adventure got real. I guess I’d like to live long enough to choose when to get on the ice flow, but choice and aging are at odds with each other. Healthcare seems to be on its way out so maintenance of health is critical but unsupported.